74/365

i went to a funeral today for one of my grandpa's. my grandma's little brother passed away over the weekend. he was in the navy and was in WWII. the chapel the services took place at was so crowded that people were standing in the lobby through the whole thing.

i'd never seen how the graveside services were for a veteran besides on tv, the real thing was something to see. they had all older navajo veterans do the gun salute and the folding of the flag. i wished i could have taken pictures. i had my camera in the car and actually debated taking pictures but i thought it would be construed as disrespectful to a lot of people there, especially my real traditional navajo relatives.

i've posed this question before: how do i balance the need to photograph everything with my more traditional side? there have been pictures that i've taken that i felt iffy on and in the end i ended up not posting it because it was too much of a question for me about whether i should even be taking pictures of that certain something or not. one such pictures that i actually posted but still question is the picture of the ants (picture 23) because of traditional reasons.

so i wish i could have pictures of this day. that i could have captured the somber air when the guns were being shot, or when the winds picked up to blow the flags that stood behind the navajo veteran as he offered the prayer before the casket was lowered, or my grandpa's wife as she lovingly tossed the rose on his grave and the heartbreakingly real grief on her face (they were married 63 years), or the tears that ran down his sister's weathered face knowing she's now the last of her brothers and sisters.

another question: why would i want to take pictures of this? because it happened.

so while i struggled with this emotionally and spiritually and tried to come to a reconciliation on it, i struggled physically to overcome this stupid illness i've contracted. i think it's strep... bleh. i'm actually starting to really like the way nyquil tastes. johnathan calls me a glonnie because he says i'm in it for the alcohol but seriously, it's starting to be that if they made an alcoholic beverage that tasted like this- i'd probably be a fan!